Creative empathy
I’ve previously written about the power of empathy (Empathy, Seeking advice or empathy? and Empathize before you offer solutions). I keep writing about it because it’s critical to a life of joy.
I have more empathy than when I was younger and know I would benefit from developing it even further. In an effort to make empathy my default response, I decided to do a January challenge. If someone does something that I don’t like or understand, I will do my best to empathize.
My friend Duncan suggested making it creative – come up with a funny story as part of your empathy. As an example, he said, “When someone cuts me off in traffic, I might imagine he’s on his way to a ballon party and he’s worried the balloons will pop if he’s late.” Yes, it’s silly and that’s the point. If you laugh about it, you’re less likely to be annoyed or frustrated.
As Duncan, Trish and I were talking about it, she went into the bathroom and finished what she was saying on the other side of the door. Without missing a beat, I told Duncan, “Trish must be worried about the bathroom depressurizing. She shut the door to keep the air in.” We all had a good laugh about it. Wow, it works!
On our weekend snowshoe adventure, Roli was pulling incessantly and Trish reminded me to try creative empathy. I wasn’t sure it would work if he kept pulling. I said, “Maybe he’s pulling so hard because he’s worried the walk is going to get away.” Then I thought, “Maybe he thinks if he pulls hard enough the world will spin more slowly, making the day last longer.” He still pulled, but the image of Roli pulling the Earth to a slower spin to extend his day distracted me enough to feel better.
What joy can you find with creative empathy?
Hopefully, my questions cause you to reflect on your own thinking, relationships or choices. Maybe I even inspire you to make positive changes.
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