Permission or forgiveness

Permission or forgiveness

There’s a saying that it’s better to ask forgiveness than ask permission. This may be true in some situations and is surely a bad idea in others. Consider the downside risk; if it’s relatively small, go for it and ask forgiveness if needed. Big risks warrant a different approach. (Discretion is the better part of valor.)

Trish and I have joint accounts for all of our finances. I regularly spend moderate amounts of money on training, equipment or things to support my hobbies and I expect she will do the same for herself. I am comfortable that it’s fine and either of us could ask forgiveness if we push the limits.

On the other hand, I wouldn’t go out and buy a new car without discussing it. Surprising Trish with a huge purchase or a new monthly payment seems unreasonable. I wouldn’t “ask permission” so much as make sure she’s comfortable with the risk.

When do you go for it and when do you discuss before you act?

Hopefully, my questions cause you to reflect on your own thinking, relationships or choices. Maybe I even inspire you to make positive changes.

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