Let them finish
In our efforts to improve our listening skills, Trish and I were discussing bad habits. Self-awareness is one of the keys to changing behavior. When you’re aware of the bad habit as it happens, you can correct it and reflect on why it happened. With enough practice you will replace the bad habit with a good one.
One of the most challenging habits is our tendency to predict how the other is going to finish their sentence. The predictions are often wrong and indicate we’re not actively listening. I suggested we should intentionally say unpredictable things to force the other to practice listening to the end. As an example, I asked her how hot air ballooning was similar to project management. (No way she could have predicted that.) When we paid close attention, we realized we constantly imagine how the other’s sentence will end.
The other bad habit we both have is interrupting the other person. It’s terribly frustrating to be interrupted when you are trying to express yourself. To help me fix this habit, Trish tried a new tactic that quickly caught my attention. I call it The Icy Stare. I noticed very quickly that I had interrupted her, felt suitably chagrined 🥶 and asked her to finish her thought.
Do you finish people’s sentences, interrupt or have other listening habits that it’s time to replace?
Hopefully, my questions cause you to reflect on your own thinking, relationships or choices. Maybe I even inspire you to make positive changes.
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